Late night ramblings are sticky and really shouldn't be attempted when sorting through life, especially at this part of the year. See, I find myself with more downtime than I care to have, simply because the year is officially over. For the most part, all plans are covering 2012 and these remaining days are spent in neutral mode; that leaves way too much time to just ponder and stumble on half-baked resolutions. It's also the holiday season which further complicates my ability to manage my moods throughout the winter season. Besides the overt commercialism and fleeting moments of goodwill, it's just too damn cold to do anything other than sit under a blanket stock still and pray the pilot light doesn't go out on the central heating. It wouldn't hurt to continue praying that I have money to pay these ridiculous utility bills, either.
Late night ramblings leaves a person wide open, so consider me vulnerable right now. At the time of this writing, I'm very candid and subject to present some information that leaves me completely exposed. But that's the risk I'm willing to take, hell, I'm an artist so bearing my soul kinda comes with the territory. I've been spending the majority of the day and night going over the year and its happenings. Many of the things that I had planned for my company didn't go along as it should, so I found myself shutting down in October to plan again, waiting to strike out fresh for 2012. For a little while, I was pretty miffed about that until one of my sweet male friends gave me a new spin on it. Once I unloaded my frustrations to him one night at Starbuck's, he merely shrugged his shoulders and said, 'That just sounds like growing pains to me. Typical stuff that comes with running a company. Just pull yourself together and keep going.' That reassurance made all of the difference. I did what he said.
As for my 'love life', that little situation with that certain Mister has officially come to a close for good, as far as I'm concerned. Five years. On again. Off again. Promises made. Promises broken. Patience. Understanding. Communication. Poor follow through. Minimal effort. All of that. For five years, y'all....and it's just over. Done. And I am just fine about it.
"It's like BOOM, Son. Grown woman, making decisions and choices....."
So, here I am, somewhere I really didn't expect to be -- searching again. Truth be told, I wanted to be done with the search. I just wanted to have this part of my life sealed up so I can completely focus on working in purpose. But no, here I am, damming up this Reservoir of Good Loving and activating my Infrared Bullshit Detector. But you know what, I find myself jaded -- almost exhausted with the whole dating thing now. I don't want to play by the rules anymore, instead, I want to make it up as I go along. Blame it on my ever-growing maturity and my near-precision dream chasing. Blame it on my need to simplify the hell outta this shit so I can stop being so perplexed about the Why, the How Come, the When, and What If. I had a refreshing glass of Fuck It! Juice recently and I just can't see me getting real deep about this thing anytime soon. That energy can be better spent somewhere else, ya dig?
I'm finding myself just unwilling to go through any motions and I'm getting a bit selfish. I think, at this point, I'm gonna make this all about me for a little while. Don't worry. I will take extra careful measures to protect them from me, so I won't be blamed for tainting any brothas -- I couldn't have that on my conscience. I'll be completely honest and free so they can walk into the set up with their eyes wide shut.
Now, what do I mean by all of this? Well, I'm in the process of making a major transition in my life and while I would have preferred to already have my man attached to me while I make these moves, that's not the case -- and I have to be willing to admit that it may not be the case for some time now. Such is the quandary of this lifestyle. It seems as though the simplest of things become the most difficult to attain so you have to be willing to dismantle and reprogram, shut down and reboot. You get the idea. So, yeah, am I the only one sitting up late at night, pondering and surmising how to move forward after the so-called Sure Thing stopped being so sure? Don't let me and Zenzile hanging, share with us. Let's get through this mess together.
It's 1:26am. Damn, I need a cuddle buddy.
Friday, December 9, 2011
Thursday, November 10, 2011
For all those lives you've ruined...
It's the Revenge of the Nice Guy! you know you've listened to some crap rap, some trap rap, some rap about cars, booty and dope slanging...you thought you did it in secret, until you accidentally burst out with the chorus at the wrong place, the wrong time and in the wrong crowd...Um hmm, it's ok, we've all done it.
However, no "deed" goes unpunished, and for that, we're now subject to Revenge...
Fortunately for us mere humans, art, like god, teaches lessons through education, not punishment. Fathom 9, a steady presence on the hip hop scene in Memphis who has taken his work across the Northeast, from Chicago to New York and back in various incarnations such as the Genesis Experiment and IMC or Iron Mic Coalition serves his revenge with fervor serving not to decimate (although lesser emcees would argue that point) but to explicate. To provide for the neophyte and hip hop aficionado alike a return to (or example of) a musical form that is simultaneously a critique, a cry and the language of an entire culture.
With the theme of "revenge", Fathom9 modeled his show and album release after the film/comic V for Vendetta, releasing the work on the fifth of November and the cameo appearance of a legion of masked V's in the audience. Primed for a revolution through terrorizing lesser emcee's, the city of Memphis and visitors from the tri-state area were served with quite the COLD dish!
Deneka Lottalox started the set with a couple of smooth songs before she really opened up and gave us the live version of Black Girls Rock. Her voice, emotion, and lyricism were all showcased in her performance of original work that the world desperately needs.
By the time Fathom9 graced the stage, the audience had been treated to work from both The Genesis Experiment and the Iron Mic Coalition, a nice lead up to the main event. When Fathom9 appeared there was a palpable sense that he was not alone; the crowd was with him. A literal huddle formed, as supporters and fans alike formed a protective circle along the periphery of the stage to indulge themselves in the historic moment. The official ass kicking and name taking that was Revenge!!!! As a fan and supporter, after months of hearing snippets, sneak peaks, sample tracks and verses, I still was not prepared for the full force of Fathom's voice, music and presence in the same place and at the same time. The emcee's energy level was incredible. Fathom delivers spitfire verses with a power and force that can only be described as a dominating passion.
Revenge is the perfect title as Fathom broke down the problems of the music industry, so called artists, his community and society in general. Through his lyricism alone, he demands and dares other "rappers" to step their game up. His self- produced music, which he explained were generated from the inability to find beats intense enough for his material yet sophisticated enough for his sensibilities, are a cultured mix. In the concert space, familiar sounds from the past juxtaposed themselves against the imagery of the present, the energy of the crowd and the emotional release we all felt, finally absolving us of our sins. Dipped in the waters of true hip hop, our musical vices were no more...
Fathom9's music is intense enough to rattle your bones and complex enough to unravel your mind. Revenge has been exacted.If you need to get your musical soul washed, start here, buy the album, then let us know how YOU live, the LoveJonesLifestyle.
However, no "deed" goes unpunished, and for that, we're now subject to Revenge...
Fortunately for us mere humans, art, like god, teaches lessons through education, not punishment. Fathom 9, a steady presence on the hip hop scene in Memphis who has taken his work across the Northeast, from Chicago to New York and back in various incarnations such as the Genesis Experiment and IMC or Iron Mic Coalition serves his revenge with fervor serving not to decimate (although lesser emcees would argue that point) but to explicate. To provide for the neophyte and hip hop aficionado alike a return to (or example of) a musical form that is simultaneously a critique, a cry and the language of an entire culture.
With the theme of "revenge", Fathom9 modeled his show and album release after the film/comic V for Vendetta, releasing the work on the fifth of November and the cameo appearance of a legion of masked V's in the audience. Primed for a revolution through terrorizing lesser emcee's, the city of Memphis and visitors from the tri-state area were served with quite the COLD dish!
Deneka Lottalox started the set with a couple of smooth songs before she really opened up and gave us the live version of Black Girls Rock. Her voice, emotion, and lyricism were all showcased in her performance of original work that the world desperately needs.
By the time Fathom9 graced the stage, the audience had been treated to work from both The Genesis Experiment and the Iron Mic Coalition, a nice lead up to the main event. When Fathom9 appeared there was a palpable sense that he was not alone; the crowd was with him. A literal huddle formed, as supporters and fans alike formed a protective circle along the periphery of the stage to indulge themselves in the historic moment. The official ass kicking and name taking that was Revenge!!!! As a fan and supporter, after months of hearing snippets, sneak peaks, sample tracks and verses, I still was not prepared for the full force of Fathom's voice, music and presence in the same place and at the same time. The emcee's energy level was incredible. Fathom delivers spitfire verses with a power and force that can only be described as a dominating passion.
Revenge is the perfect title as Fathom broke down the problems of the music industry, so called artists, his community and society in general. Through his lyricism alone, he demands and dares other "rappers" to step their game up. His self- produced music, which he explained were generated from the inability to find beats intense enough for his material yet sophisticated enough for his sensibilities, are a cultured mix. In the concert space, familiar sounds from the past juxtaposed themselves against the imagery of the present, the energy of the crowd and the emotional release we all felt, finally absolving us of our sins. Dipped in the waters of true hip hop, our musical vices were no more...
Fathom9's music is intense enough to rattle your bones and complex enough to unravel your mind. Revenge has been exacted.If you need to get your musical soul washed, start here, buy the album, then let us know how YOU live, the LoveJonesLifestyle.
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